By Karen James
A disturbing wave of domestic violence is sweeping across the U.S. as some Nigerian men, unable to cope with shifting power dynamics in their marriages, resort to killing their wives—women they once sponsored to emigrate and often supported through nursing school. Many of these men feel humiliated by their wives’ newfound financial independence and perceive it as a threat to their traditional role as heads of the household. This tragic pattern has led to an alarming number of deaths in recent years.
In Hennepin, Minnesota, David Ochola, 50, called 911 after shooting his 28-year-old wife, Priscilla Ochola, dead. His frustration stemmed from Priscilla, now a registered nurse (RN), earning more money than him and disregarding his authority in the household. According to David, Priscilla had begun “coming and going as she chose,” treating him with disrespect since achieving financial independence. The couple, who had two young children, had been struggling as David felt sidelined in his role as a husband.
Similarly, in Dallas, Texas, Babajide Okeowo, 48, drove several hundred miles to kill his ex-wife, Funke Okeowo, who had gained control of the family’s finances after becoming a nurse. Following their divorce, Funke won the family home and custody of their children. This perceived loss of power and control drove Babajide to shoot Funke multiple times while she sat in her car, minutes before she was to celebrate her birthday.
Texas has been the backdrop for several of these gruesome cases. In one of the most chilling, Moses Egharevba, 45, killed his wife, Grace, 35, by striking her with a sledgehammer. Their seven-year-old daughter witnessed the horrific crime. Grace’s “crime” was that she had become more financially successful than her husband, who had initially brought her to the U.S. and funded her nursing education. Moses, unable to handle the shift in their financial power dynamic, resorted to brutal violence.
Another Texas man, Christopher Ndubuisi, killed his wife, Christiana, with a sledgehammer as she slept. Christiana, an RN, had also become the primary breadwinner in their household. Christopher, who had tried in vain to control his wife through her family, could not handle her independence and struck her repeatedly until she died. Suspicion surrounds the earlier death of Christiana’s mother, who had died under unusual circumstances during a visit to the U.S. two years before.
These tragic cases extend beyond Texas. In Tennessee, Godfrey Nwodo killed both his wife, Agnes, and her mother after suffering years of what he perceived as humiliation. Godfrey had brought Agnes to the U.S., supporting her through nursing school, only for her to take full control of their household. Using U.S. family law to her advantage, Agnes frequently had Godfrey removed from their home by police. Eventually, Godfrey snapped and took both her and her mother’s lives in a fit of rage.
In Maryland, Caleb Onwudike murdered his wife, Chinyere, on New Year’s Day after years of escalating tension. Chinyere, who became a nurse after Caleb funded her education, no longer sought her husband’s input on major decisions, including the purchase of their home and building a house in Nigeria. After her return from a lavish burial for her father, which she attended without Caleb’s approval, he killed her in their home.
The most horrifying case occurred in Los Angeles, where Joseph Mbu dragged his wife, Gloria, to her death behind his car after tying her to the vehicle. Gloria, who had also become a nurse, was reported to have constantly challenged Joseph’s authority, a dynamic that worsened after she began earning more than him. Unable to cope with her independence and what he saw as constant disrespect, Joseph took her life in the most brutal of ways.
These killings have shocked the Nigerian-American community and raised alarm over the rising tensions within immigrant families. As traditional gender roles are upended by economic shifts, many men find themselves unable to cope, leading to tragic and deadly outcomes. Community leaders are now calling for urgent action, including cultural sensitivity training and mental health support, to prevent further tragedies. This epidemic of violence points to deep-seated issues around masculinity, control, and the challenges of adjusting to life in a new country.
